I acted kinda bad last night and said some bad things. He flat out pissed me off and I told him about it.  He then proceeded to nip my arguing in the bud by going to bed. I don’t like to go to bed angry. We have a rule about that. If we start ignoring the rules, then what’s the point?

He’s distant but quasi normal today. I’m normal today. How do I bring up last night without him hearing the DING for the next round of boxing ? I’m not good at tame. Not good at all.

I also thought today about taking the lamictal – full on 100mg. If I could learn to control the anger, it squashed my sex drive. Maybe if I killed my sexual drive, we could be normal. Is that normal? Twice a week? Maybe 3 if it’s my birthday? I think I might die if I were to accept right here and now that I would only get it twice – and that’s all I would WANT to have as well.

Yeah, I think I might die.

Yes, there are worse things. I just can’t think of any right now.